Life is Cruel
by BlindPanda
Summary: She had been there almost his entire life. Her comforting words had helped to guild him through the worst years of his homelife. Find out what happens as they journey through the trials of growing up to be adults that shape the world.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One: Realization**

All he could do is laugh.

What else could he do? His best friend and his best friend's wife had been taken abruptly away from him. He had to watch as his godson, Harry, was pulled out of the rubble and sent to Dumbledore. Even She was lost to him. To top it all off he was betrayed by someone he trusted. All he had left in his hollow life was the will to laugh. It would probably make him look even more guilty, but he didn't care.

The smouldering rubble and strewn bodies surrounded him. The rat had gotten away. But nobody was looking for the rat, they were looking at him. A man, descended from a family of prejudice pure bloods, was sitting on his knees in the middle of the chaos laughing. How much more convincing could the moment be? It didn't matter that he would have died to save his best friend. It didn't matter how much of a brother he was to him. It didn't matter that he had chosen a path far from his mother's ideals. Just the fact of him looking guilty condemned him.

He knew what would happen next. They would come to take him to the prison, but even that place wouldn't take away the truth from his mind. He was innocent. The walls, bars, and demons of that prison would never stand a chance against his real terror. His own personal hell awaited him in his own mind. The "what if" thoughts would torture him for the rest of his life. What if James and Lily had survived? What if he had been able to get Harry? What if She had never been in his life? Would things have been different?


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors Note:** The chapters after this one will be a bit longer. This is just to introduce you into the storyline and my main character through the eyes of Sirius.

**Discalimer!** I forgot to add one to the first story (Yikes!) But yeah, I don't own any of the HP characters etc etc. The only character I own every bit of is the girl introduced in this chapter!

**Chapter Two: Her**

He hated this house. The house of Black was as evil as the name suggested. Oh, how he hated his mother and father. Their thoughts about anyone not born to a pureblood family were terrible. He couldn't stand being around them and their talk of "purifying" the wizarding schools. It made him sick.

He did get along with his brother, Regulus, even though he was starting to adopt their parents ideals. They would talk of life and magic while sitting on the roof. Those were the days that made him the happiest. Except when She came to visit.

She was Regulus's best friend and his mother's favorite visitor. With her white-blonde hair and brilliant green eyes, she was the most beautiful ten year old anyone had ever seen. Everyone loved her, except for her own family it seemed. Her family treated her like dirt because she didn't hold to their standard of thinking. The only reason for her frequent visits was because Mother and Regulus loved her so. To Mother it was a blessing. This was because one of her sons was interested in a child of another well-known pureblood family, for she was the youngest of the Malfoy children.

Seda was everything the Malfoys were not. Kind and loving, she was a beacon of light in this dark, Black house. Her friendship with Regulus was nothing compared to the relationship she had with him. Whenever his mother was cruel to him, Seda was there to comfort him. It was a blessing that Mother loved her so much that she invited Seda over almost every day during the summer, and this summer was when things began to change for them all.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note:** Woohoo! Made it to the 3rd Chapter! Just to let you know the perspective has changed from Sirius to Seda. Hope it doesn't get too confusing. Reviews would be helpful guys!

**Chapter Three: Warm Welcome**

"Regi!"

Seda dropped her overnight bag and ran toward her friend. It had only been two days since they had last seen each other, but her joy came mostly from not having to be in her family's house with her father.

"Oh how I've missed you, Regi."

"I've missed you too, Seda."

The two 10 year olds hugged each other in the hallway. Regulus's mother stood in the doorway of the kitchen and Sirius, Regulus's brother, sat on the stairs. Seda's father pushed his way passed the two, mumbling something about how he never would allow such public displays of affection in his home. Seda's brother, Lucius, stood silently by the closed front door with a high and mighty look upon his face, fit for any Malfoy.

"Well, she is your problem now Mrs. Black. Good day to you."

Mr. Malfoy made a slight motion of respect to the lady of the house and moved towards the exit, making sure to push Seda towards the wall on his way out. Lucius followed his father out of the house and closed the door behind them.

"It's good to have you back, dear. you know where your room is, so why don't you go put your belongings up there. Then you and Regulus can play me a little tune on the piano, since _some_," Mrs. Black glances up in Sirius's direction, "of my children refuse to indulge their mother."

"Yes Ma'am."

With a small curtsy, Seda made her way up the stairs with the two boys following close behind. At the top of the stairs, she abruptly turned and threw herself at Sirius.

"Oh Siri! I missed you as well," she pulled back from her forceful hug, "You know that, right?"

Sirius chuckled a bit. "Yea, I understand that to hug me in front of Mother would cause you to lose your safe haven. Though, your father's eyes bulging at the sight of us hugging might be worth it."

She contemplated this for a second, "Hehehe maybe."

The two stared at each other, for what seemed like forever, until Regulus made a loud coughing sound which caused Sirius and Seda to snap out of their trance. Without another word, Seda went to her room, closed the door behind her, and let out a gentle sigh.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Authors Note: **_Sorry for not posting recently. School has been a bit hectic. Hope you enjoy!

_**Disclaimer:**_ I don't own any of these characters except Seda …blah blah blah etc etc

**Chapter Four: Little Mistress**

After unpacking her few belongings, Seda set off down the stairs. There was a terrible burst of noise from the ground floor. She heard someone running and there was a bit of banging on a piano. As she reached the bottom of the stairs, she heard the boys' mother screaming.

"YOU ARE A WORTHLESS PIECE OF FLESH!"

"YEAH? WELL SO ARE YOU!"

"HOW COULD I PRODUCE SUCH AN UNGRATEFUL, STUPID, MUGGLE-LOVING..."

"Well Mum, why don't you just go through your entire list of insults and get this whole thing OVERWITH!"

As Seda made her way into the piano room, she gasped at the sight before her. Sirius was on one side of the room, clinging to the top of a bookshelf. His mother was swinging an umbrella at him. Regulus was sitting quietly at the piano as if nothing was amiss. As soon as Regulus saw her step through the doorway, he jumped up and tried to usher her out of the room.

"Regi, what's going on?"

He whispered into her ear, "Seda, don't. Mum and Siri always go at it. You should know this by now."

"But she has never done anything like this before."

"Not while you were here anyway."

Mrs. Black turned at the sound of the two ten-year-olds talking, but did not stop her attack on poor Sirius, who was squirming towards the back end of the top of the bookshelf.

"Why Seda, I am so sorry you had to witness this, but discipline must be enforced."

With that said, Mrs. Black reached up and yanked Sirius down by his ankle. He hit the ground with a nauseating crack and lay still. He did not cry out because he would not give his mother the pleasure. Tears formed in the corners of Seda's eyes. She had seen and felt such cruelty from her father. This is what brought her and Siri so close.

_I feel so helpless. I want so much to help him, to go and comfort him. But I am a coward. I would lose my haven. At least dear Siri will be safe when he goes to Hogwarts. I will miss him terribly, but he will be away from his mother's tyranny._

Regulus taking her arm and leading her to the piano interrupted Seda's thoughts. Mrs. Black had apparently requested a performance. Seda and Regi had played only a few songs before Mrs. Black left the room to attend to other things. Sirius was still lying on the floor, shaking.

"Siri? Do you think you can make it up the stairs?"

He mumbled something, but got up and made his way up the stairs. Seda and Regulus were not far behind him. When he reached his room, Sirius slammed the door and locked it. Seda reached up to knock on the door, but heard Mrs. Black coming down the stairs, so she headed to her room. On her way she bumped into the Black family's house elf, Kreacher.

"Begging the little Mistress's pardon. Kreacher did not see he was in the little Mistress's path."

"It is alright Kreacher. I was the one who wasn't looking."

"Does the little Mistress need anything?"

"No Kreacher, I don't need anything."

"Then Kreacher shall be on his way, little Mistress."

When Kreacher was out of sight, Seda opened and crawled out a window. She proceeded to Sirius's window and lightly tapped on the glass. When he didn't come to the window, Seda let herself in. She scanned the room and saw Sirius curled up on his bed. Seda tiptoed over to the edge of the bed and sat down. The bed squeaked and Siri looked over at her. Her heart broke at the sight of his tears. She crawled over to him, never taking her eyes from his.

"Oh, Siri..."

This was all she managed to say before he began to cry. She knew how much he hated her seeing him like this. For all of his charm, Sirius could not seem to hide his feelings from her, especially when he was feeling frightened and vulnerable. Seda hugged him closely and let him cry. She began to cry with him, at one point. There they sat until both fell asleep, Seda still cradling Sirius in her arms. She woke up later that night, kissed him on the forehead, and made her way out his window to hers.

As she lay in her bed, this ten-year-old girl realized something that would change her life.

_I love him._


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five: Homeward Bound**

The next week passed by very quickly for the three children. It was soon time for Sirius to head to Hogwarts. Mrs. Black had already gathered the things he would need for school, so there would be no trip to Diagon Alley. The night before the trip to the train station, Seda was talking to Sirius in his room.

"You excited 'bout going?"

Sirius glanced up from his packing to give her a quizzical look. "What do you think? A whole bloody year without my mother's constant screams and beatings."

She sighed. "So you're not going to miss anything?"

"Bloody hell. What could I possibly miss around here?"

Seda looked down at the ground. This past week had been the same fun that they had always had, but there was more of an emotional attachment for her this time.

_Do I mean that little to him? He means the world to me, but does he feel the same? Will he forget me once he is at school?_

Just the thought of Sirius forgetting her made tears well up in her eyes. She sniffled a bit and turned away. When Sirius heard the sniffle, he looked up from his luggage. He saw her looking at his floor, shaking from trying so hard to keep back the tears. He hugged her from behind, lifting her off the ground.

"Awww Seda. You know I will miss you every minute of every hour of every day."

He set her down and turned her to face him. A single tear escaped her green eyes. He brushed it away.

"I promise. I could never forget you."

With that, the two hugged. Regulus came into the room as they split. His eyes revealed how deeply he was affected by their relationship. In truth he was just jealous that his brother connected with Seda on a level that he could never reach. Regulus would never admit that and would try to never show that.

"Siri, Mum says it's time for you to go."

Sirius smiled at his brother, embraced him, grabbed his things, and headed downstairs. The two friends were left staring at each other. Seda smiled at her Regi and took his hand.

"Come on Regi, I only have a few hours before my father comes to get me."

The two friends talked and played until Seda's father showed up to collect her. Mrs. Black patted her head and Regulus hugged her. With her head hanging low, she followed her father, Abraxas Malfoy, out the door.

When they reached Malfoy Manor, her father shoved her through the door. He didn't even bother to look at her as he continued on through the house. Her eyes slowly wandered about the room. This place was supposed to be her home, but to her it was her hell. The only friend that she had was the house elf Dobby, who was treated as badly and sometimes worse than she was.

Seda made her way to her room in the cellar. It was basically a dungeon, figuratively and literally. A cry of glee was emitted from one of the dark corners. It was Dobby.

"Dobby is so glad little Miss Seda is home."

She wrapped him in a hug; "I've missed you as well Dobby."

Seda climbed into bed, and Dobby tucked her in. "Goodnight little Miss."


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six: A Cold Day in Hell**

With her brother gone to school, Seda was the only child left to in the cold manor. Her parents ignored her with such skill few even knew they had a daughter. Her days were spent by herself drawing or writing. Sometimes she would spend time with Dobby, when he wasn't too busy. She wrote letters to Sirius and to Regulus every week. She wanted to send them one everyday, but her parents only allowed her use of the family owl once a week, and that was only because Mrs. Black would worry if there were no post from her at all.

It was getting colder, so she knew Sirius would be coming home for the Christmas Holidays soon. That meant she could go and visit the Black house. Her father never wanted her away from the house during the school season. He said it was improper, just as treating house elves like equals was improper. Seda never cared for anything her father said. She would daydream to keep herself occupied. Most of her dreams consisted of Sirius riding in on a white horse and rescuing her from her horrid life.

Her dreams wouldn't save her the day she needed them most. It was a cold, miserable day in November. The noise that could be heard for miles around was the sound of the Malfoy parents yelling.

"WHERE IS IT? ANSWER ME YOU LITTLE HEATHEN!"

Her parents had misplaced something, so naturally they blamed her and poor Dobby. He had been kicked down the stairs to look in the cellar, so Seda's father turned to her. He had her by the scruff of the neck, shaking her.

"WHERE DID YOU PUT IT?!?"

"I d-d-d-don't kn-n-n-now w-w-w-wh-what you're t-t-talking about f-f-father."

"YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT! YOU'RE JUST AN LYING LITTLE BRAT WHO WON'T TELL ME WHAT YOU DID WITH IT!"

He was shaking her so hard she couldn't even think straight enough to form sentences. To top it off, she had no clue what was missing. That's when her father began to slap her. Then, he threw her at the wall. Her mother came in yelling that it wasn't in the drawing room. She saw her helpless daughter on the floor and kicked her. Tears were flowing from Seda's eyes now. She began to crawl away from the hatred and anger, but her father grabbed her and beat her some more. Soon Dobby returned and said that it wasn't in the cellar. Her father beat him too, and then sent him to look through the rest of the house. When his back was turned Seda ran. She picked her favored cupboard and hid. Dobby joined her soon after.

"W-w-what were -sniffle- they looking -sniffle- for anyway, Dobby?"

"N-n-no idea little Miss."

The two of them stayed close and silent. Her parents would soon concentrate on other things, then she and Dobby could return to her room. They waited until all the lights went out. They peeked out of the cupboard, and then tiptoed to the cellar. She cried herself to sleep that night. No, her dreams could not save her from her hell, so she decided she would have to save herself.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven: The Letter**

My Dear Siri,

My life hasn't changed at all since my last letter to you. My parents have decided that I need to be reformed and to do that I will not be able to visit as much as I want. Father says that I will be able to see Regi when I start school, but I don't think my heart could take it.

My father and mother are paying more attention to me. You would think it would make any ten-year-old happy to spend time with their parents, but it is a miserable time for me. I am learning a lot about magic, though. I miss you and Regi. I miss you two so much. Sometimes my dreams fool me into thinking that I am back at your house and all is back to the way it was.

It's sad to think that a ten-year-old feels so much older than I am. I always have to be two steps ahead of my parents so I can protect Dobby and myself. Just last night my parents were rampaging again. It was because I was slow in answering them. Father didn't beat me though. They don't want any bruises or scars to show when they force me to go to their parties. Apparently someone high up found out they had a daughter and began to ask questions. They are trying o make me presentable to society...I think anyway.

They make me wear fancy dresses and curtsey and smile. It's enough to make me sick at my stomach. There is no love for me in their eyes. Only obligation. Oh Siri I feel helpless. Life is so cruel to the both of us. At least you are safe from your mother's rage. Soon I will be from my father's.

My birthday is coming up. I never expect much though. I think being eleven is no different than being ten. I can't wait for Hogwarts. It is the one thing I have to look forward to since I'll be eleven. From your letters, it is the most beautiful place in the world. I think anything would be more beautiful than the life I have now. I hope I get to be in the same house as you. Then we can spend more time together. That would give your mother a fright!

How are your new friends you mentioned in your last letter? What were their names again? James, Remus, and Peter? They sound like loads of fun. James seems like he could be your brother, from the way you wrote about him. Remus sounds like a sweetheart and a brainiac. You never say much about Peter, but I'm sure he is just a cool as the other guys.

Well I can hear Mother yelling for me. Write to me soon!

Dream Well,

Seda


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight: Hogwarts Express**

In no time, it was time for Seda to shop for her school supplies. Mrs. Black had offered to take her and Regulus to get their stuff together. Sirius joined them as well. Regulus and Seda laughed and joked with each other, and when Mrs. Black's back was turned Sirius and Seda shared some whispered jokes. After all of the shopping, Seda obtaining a rowan wand with a Chimaera Scale core and a tiny gray owl whom she named Pigmy, the group returned to Grimmauld Place.

"Regi! Have you seen my Piggy?"

"Piggy?"

"Yeah, my owl Pigmy. I can't seem to find him."

"I saw him upstairs."

"Thanks Regi!" Seda shouted as she ran up the stairs. She could always find an excuse to visit her Siri. Her father had given her permission to stay at the Black's house until the day the Hogwarts Express left and that news created such joy in Seda that it was hard for her not to run and hug her father. She was so excited to be able to spend time with Sirius before school, but was even more excited about the upcoming year of school.

"Siri." She was pressed against a crack in her room floor that was directly above Sirius's room and whispering so that Mrs. Black wouldn't hear.

A shuffling sound could be heard, "Yeah Seda?"

"I can't wait until Hogwarts."

"Neither can I"

"Can I sit with you and your friends on the train?"

A knock sounded on Sirius's door that cut the conversation off. "Time to go!"

As the three of them got on the train, Seda leaned over to Sirius and whispered, "So can I sit with you Siri?"

Sirius hesitated, "Uh, what about Regulus? Are you going to make him sit all by himself?"

"I thought we could all sit together, or something."

"Eh, I don't know Seda What if it gets back to my mother that you've been seen with me?"

"B-b-but I thought..."

She was cut off by a boy with messy hair and glasses, " 'Ello Sirius! Nice summer?

"Ha ha James, really funny"

With that, the boys left Seda standing next to an empty car. She sat down, almost in tears. Oh course she knew that all would not be as perfect at Hogwarts as she expected, but it didn't take the sting away. Regulus wandered by, checking the windows to see if the cars were empty. He sat down next to her and gave her a hug.

"It'll be okay Se-Se"

"I know Regi"

Standing before the Sorting Hat is one of the most terrifying things at Hogwarts. Seda was shivering with anticipation and fear. She knew that any House other than Slytherin would be shameful to her family, but she had heard stories about that House and was terrified. It was her turn. Regulus was already sorted into Slytherin, and Sirius was in Gryffindor. Her two best friends were in two different places. It was going to rip her apart.

_Please, just put me in the place where I belong._

_"Gryffindor!" The hat shouted._

There were no overly loud cheers or shouts for her. Puzzled faces were all that accompanied Seda to her seat, which was not too close to any of the other students. She never felt more out of place than at that table. Sirius's face showed no emotion at all, and Regulus looked disappointed.

Was this were she belonged?


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine: Old Fears, New Friends**

"Why don't you talk to me Siri?"

"Seda I told you why."

"You never explained it to me. Why don't you like me?"

"You know I like you. Look things are just complicated, okay?"

She sighed, "Whatever. So we can only talk in secret?"

There came no reply because Sirius had already gone to join his friends at the House table. It had only been a week into school and she was already missing the Black House. Only two people seemed to be kind to her, and they would only do so in small bursts because they were a year older than her. Remus Lupin always had something nice to say, but he restrained himself around his friends due to the distance that had to be kept from Seda.

Mostly she spent time with Regulus and his friends. "The Glyfforin" is what they called her. Almost every Gryffindor thought she had been placed in the wrong house, and they made a point of telling her so.

"This seat taken?"

Seda looked up from her perch under the tree next to the lake. Remus Lupin stared down at her.

"No, not unless you count the thousands of tiny microorganisms that live there."

Remus chuckled. "If you didn't want me to sit, you could have just said so."

"No, no. You can sit if you wish."

Remus settled down next to her. "What do you do out here?"

"Think."

"About what?"

"Life."

"What about it?"

"How cruel it is."

"Ever the optimistic."

Seda turned to regard him. "What do you want?"

"A conversation that doesn't revolve how to torture Filch."

She giggled at that comment. Remus smiled.

"Ah, so you can be happy."

"That I can, if anyone would give me the chance to."

"I don't see you smile when you are with your friends."

"What friends?"

"The people you spend time with, you know, your friends."

"I don't think I have friends anymore."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because neither really talks to me anymore."

"Why?"

"Because they are too busy with their new friends."

"Why?"

"Because people seem to like them."

"Why?"

"Because they hate me."

"Why?"

"No idea."

"Why?"

"Because you're an idiot."

"Why--What?"

"Ha Ha! Gotcha!"

The two of them laughed.

"So my friend, you doing anything after Potions?"

"Why do you ask Remus?"

"Well the guys have detention, again, and I would like to do something other than study."

"Like what?"

"Dunno, but I figured we two brainiacs could think of something."

"Like what?"

"Dunno."

"Why?"

"What?"

"You're an idiot"

"Why?"

Seda chuckled, "Because you are the dumbest smart guy I know."


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten: Find Out Who Your Friends Are**

Every time Sirius, James, and Peter would get detention, Remus would have time to spend with his new friend Seda. Since that happened almost every week, they got to know each other pretty well. Remus thought that Sirius was being stupid by not talking to her, but he would never mention it because she begged him not to. They told each other everything during their small talks. Seda and Remus became so close that they could read each other's expressions and tone like they had lived together their whole life. So it wasn't surprising when Seda figured out Remus's huge secret.

The two were leaning on the sofa in front of the fireplace.

"Rems, You've been acting weird lately."

"How do you mean?"

"You're moody, irritable, twitchy..."

"Your point?"

"Umm, well, I want to know what's up."

"The ceiling, the sky, some birds, stars, the Moon..."

Seda reached back and popped him in the head.

"HEY!"

"Don't be such a bloody prick"

"Well you asked..."

Seda reared back, and Remus flinched.

"You learn fast."

"Oh shut up"

"See what I mean. You're all grumpy."

Remus turned away from her. It was apparent something was troubling him deeply. It hurt Seda to see her friend so distraught. Then it dawned on her.

"The Moon? Rems, does that have something to do with your disappearances?"

He didn't look at her.

"Oh my, you're a were-"

He whipped around so suddenly, Seda jumped. "Don't."

"But-"

"Just. Don't."

He started to get up to leave. With out thinking, She placed her hand in his and squeezed.

"Rems, it doesn't matter."

The tears that were being held back began to flow freely. He just stood there holding her hand. The look on his face could melt any cold heart.

"You- you aren't revolted?"

"Why? Because something happened that was beyond your control? Really Rems, I have seen more revolting and hideous things than you."

"R-r-right. I think you're lying."

"You have obviously never seen Sirius's room."

That dragged a giggle out of Remus.

"Ah so you can be happy"

"Oh shut up"

"Hehehe... Wait I think I hear someone coming."

"You won't tell anyone will you?"

"What do you think? Gah! You really are the dumbest smart guy ever!"

That said, Seda jumped up and headed towards her dorm. She could hear James and Sirius talking as they entered the common room. The mentioned something about the Lily Evans girl that Seda shared her room with, but she didn't linger long enough to find out why.

"What about this?"

Seda had been looking up ways to help Remus with his "hairy" problem. Every chance she got, she went to the library and would drag Remus along when she could. She would even try to get Sirius to meet her in the library for their little chats.

"What about what?"

"Moonstones."

"What about 'em?"

"They have magical properties that give emotional balance."

"Eh that might work, but not for my larger problem."

"True. I'll keep looking."

She searched for another hour until she found something that was just too good to pass up.

"Hey Rems!"

"What?"

"How about this?"

She shoved the book in front of his nose.

"Animagus transformation?"

"Yeah, it would be perfect. Change into an animal and help keep you away from people, by force if need be."

"Hmm could work."

"Are the other guys looking up ways?"

"James and Sirius? Research? Oh don't make me laugh."

"Well they were smart enough to figure out your problem."

"Bleh."

"Should I 'Inspire' Siri with the Animagus idea?"

They shared a laugh, and went to studying the spells required to be an Animagus.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven: Full Moon Friends**

"I hear that you and Lily are becoming good friends."

"Yeah, Rems. But she could never replace you, my wolfie."

"Ha ha very funny"

It had been three years since Seda had found out about Remus's werewolf problem. She had since perfected the spells to become an Animagus, and regularly went with Remus to the Shrieking Shack to be with him during his transformations. She still spent time with Regulus, more so out of school than in, and she still chatted with Sirius, also more out of school than in it. She was becoming really good friends with Lily Evans, who shared a room with her. Poor Lily was the object of James Potter's affections. Still, the person she spent the most time with was Remus.

"Bloody hell, has this tunnel gotten longer?"

"No, you're just shrinking."

"Yeah, like having your head scrape against the top of the tunnel is any better."

This night was like any other full moon night. The two would travel to the shack before the moon rose and wait until Remus began his transformation. After the change they would wander about. A giant white tiger and a werewolf trotting along together made quite an odd pair. She would keep him in line and keep him from hurting himself or anyone as best as she could. Then they would transform back and return to their dorms.

As they reached the opening to the Shrieking Shack, Remus experienced a shudder of pain.

"Are you alright Rems?"

"What do you think?"

"You don't have to be so bloody mean."

"Sorry Seds. It's just this time of the month."

"Hehehe I understand more than you know."

Remus paused to look at her, "Now that's just gross."

"Hey you brought it up."

They shared a laugh as they climbed the stairs into the shack. As they reached the top, Remus was hit with another wave of pain. This one caused him to grab a hold of an old table corner, alerting Seda that something was wrong.

"Here why don't you come sit down Rems."

She guided him to one of the chairs and gently settled him into it.

"You don't have to be so overly motherly to me."

"Well, you're my friend so I want to take care of you."

"But why do you insist on coming down here when it is so dangerous for you. I mean if you get caught..."

"Bloody hell Rems, are you going to try to talk me out of coming down here AGAIN? When will you get it through your head that no matter what you say I am going to accompany you down here?"

He sighed. Then was hit by another wave of pain. His transformation began as soon as the pain ended. His skin stretched and contorted. Fur began to sprout from his body. He doubled over howling in pain. Seda ran to his side and put her arm around him. A tear came to her eye as she spotted the green moonstone she had given him last year. Finally the beast broke free of its fleshy cage. The monster she was holding onto threw her across the room. Thinking quickly, Seda was in her white tiger Animagus form before she hit the wall.

The werewolf snarled and leapt at the tiger. The tiger jumped away barely missing the outstretched claws of the rabid creature. The werewolf pursued, snapping his dripping maw whenever he got close to her. The tiger became a white blur pouncing around the squeaking shack. Whenever he would get too close she would hiss, swat, and bound away. A while later the werewolf had the tiger backed up into a corner, cutting off any escape. She hesitated as he slowly stalked his prey. Then, in a flash, white and mousy brown collided in a raking, slashing mass of flesh. Her claws extended and ripped into the beast's shoulder. He growled with pain and sent the tiger flying through the air, smashing a chair, and sliding into the wall.

Her physical pain was nothing compared to her emotional pain. She couldn't help but remember that this was one of her closest friends. But this was not the case when the enraged animal inside of him broke free. With every ounce of strength she had left, the tiger pulled herself onto her feet. The werewolf approached her, shoulder bleeding heavily, with his snarl showing his razor teeth. The tiger reared back and smacked him across his snout, ripping the flesh. With that the wolf let out such a howl of pain and backed away. Whimpering, he started his way up the stairs and the tiger followed.

In the bedroom upstairs, the werewolf was licking his wounds. She approached cautiously. He looked up and her and whimpered. She settled down behind him. He emitted a low growl. She licked the wound on his face, and he yelped in pain. The tiger purred quietly, calming the whining beast. They curled up and drifted into sleep.

The sun had not appeared in the sky when the two woke. Seda immediately attended to Remus's many wounds.

"Sorry 'bout the shoulder, Rems."

He chuckled. "It's not so bad." Then he stopped to ponder, "Unless it will get you to stop smacking me in the head if it is worse."

She stared at him with a smirk on her face, "I have no clue what you are talking about."

He winced as Seda rubbed a healing salve on his shoulder wound.

"Oh, stop being such a baby, Rems."

"Let me rip a hole in your shoulder, rub that bloody stuff in the wound, and let's see how you feel."

She chuckled, then saw the gash across his cheek, and gasped. She tenderly reached up and smoothed some salve on the torn skin.

"That's going to be a nasty scar."

"Well, Seds, at least I'll have something to remember you always."

"That's not funny."

They stared at each other, and then burst into laughter. Remus got fully dressed and hobbled towards the door.

"Well we should be heading back."


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve: Seda VS Sirius (Round One)**

As Seda and Remus entered the secret portal of the Gryffindor common room, they noticed that something seemed to be off. From a chair in front of the fireplace came a voice.

"Where in Merlin's beard have you two been?"

Sirius peered around the chair. Remus and Seda stopped in their tracks.

"Siri, what are you doing up?"

"I think the better question is 'Why are you out so late with Remus?'"

Seda and Remus exchanged glances, and then he headed towards his room.

"I think I am able to spend time with whoever I wish."

"Oh really? Then why did you choose one of my friends?"

"I didn't choose him, Siri. He was one of the only people that would talk to me, in public anyway."

"What are you trying to say?"

"I'm saying that he is not afraid to talk to me."

"I talk to you."

"No you would rather spend your time getting into trouble with James."

"Just because I have friends other than you..."

"Oh do shut up. You don't want to be associated with your family or anyone friends with your family so you chose not to have anything to do with me during school. You barely speak to me anymore unless it is for me to comfort you about your mum, you don't tell me what you and the guys are up to anymore, and you don't even warn me of any future pranks so I can avoid them. Just face it Siri, you don't care to spend time with me, but you don't want anyone else to fill your vacant position."

"Seda, you know that I care for you. It's just you've been seen hanging out with Slytherins and.."

"SO HAS LILY! Lily's best friend is a Slytherin!"

"Lily is different.."

"Why? Because your best friend fancies her? So what."

"Look ..."

"No, I'm not going to listen to you try to redeem yourself using your charm. For once I couldn't care less. I was out tonight with Remus because you, James, and Peter haven't been able to use your Animagus forms to accompany him yet."

"What do..."

"I mean that I have been spending every full moon night trying to keep Remus from hurting anyone."

"How did you..."

"I figured it out my first year."

"But.."

"See you don't talk to me enough to even know that."

"I..."

"Forget it. I'm going to bed."

"Seda why..?"

"Just stop it."

"WILL YOU LET ME TALK ALREADY! Bloody hell girl!"

"Siri, you were my best friend growing up. We shared our pains and joys, but all things like that end eventually. It's ok. I just wish that it hadn't."

Seda didn't wait for him to respond and went up to her room. Sirius was left in the common room with only his thoughts.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen: Parting of Ways**

"The O.W.L.s are one of the most important tests a young witch or wizard will take. The scores you make will determine which classes you may take next year. Those classes will determine what you will be able to do for the rest of your life."

McGonagall's speeches were not as inspirational as they could have been. Everyone knew the pressure that the O.W.L.s placed on the fifth years. Seda could only thank her lucky stars that it wasn't her time to take them just yet. It was time, however, for most of her friends. Lily and Severus had been studying day and night for them. Remus was as well and trying to get the rest of the Marauders to do so. That was a task fit for anyone. Seda would help anyone who would ask as much as she could. Finally the day had come for them to take their O.W.L.s.

Seda waited outside by here favorite tree by the lake for everyone to get finished. The first person to turn up was Lily. She and Seda had become really close because they shared a dorm and shared many of the same interests. One of their favorite past times was coming up with creative ways of saying James and Sirius were being arrogant pricks. Lily greeted Seda with a hug, and the two girls skipped down to the edge of the lake.

The next to show up were the Marauders. They sat down underneath the same tree that Seda had sat only moments ago. James was playing with a Snitch he had apparently nicked. Typical Remus had pulled out a book and begun to read. Sirius was staring around at the other people in his haughty but still handsome manner. Peter was being the suck up that he always was. Seda thought it was only fitting that his Animagus form was a rat because she thought it truly applied to him.

Sev was the last one to reach the lake edge. He nodded a greeting to the girls and sat down in the shadow of a dense clump of bushes and began to pour over his O.W.L. parchment. Seda thought he was truly brilliant, with the exception of the crowd he spent his time with. He and Regulus had taken up with a very unsavory group, but Seda was never one to judge just by the people you hang out with.

After a few moments Seda saw James and Sirius approaching Severus, who was standing up and adjusting himself rather quickly.

_Oh no. This is going to be very, very bad. Please guys. Don't. You can't be that heartless._

"All right, Snivellus?"

Sev's reaction to James's overly loud taunt was so fast that he had to be expecting the attack. He whipped out his wand, but James disarmed him just as fast. James knocked Sev to his feet with another spell. Severus let out a stream of curses and jinxes. Then James cast a spell that made bubbles froth from Severus's mouth. At this point Seda had had enough. She got up from her place next to Lily and walked towards where the boys were. Lily followed suit.

"Leave him ALONE!" both girls bellowed at the same moment.

James and Sirius spun around to look at the two approaching.

"All right Evans?"

"Leave him alone. What's he done to you?"

"Well, it's more the fact that he exists, if you know what I mean.."

"You think you're funny. But you're jus an arrogant, bullying toerag, Potter. Leave him alone."

Seda's attention was drawn to Lupin, who looked like he was still reading, but his eyes hadn't moved from their original spot. She couldn't believe he was content to do nothing. Further still she couldn't believe that her beloved Siri was taking part in this horrid scene.

Seda was distracted from her thoughts by a flash of green light, which caused a gash on the side of James's face. In another flash Severus was flipped upside down in the air.

"Let him down." Both girls said at once.

"Certainly." James said as he caused Severus to crumple to the ground. He cast another spell that made Sev go all rigid.

Seda ignored the rest of the row that Lily and James were having. She instead stared at Sirius who was taking it in with amusement. Seda's concentration was broke when she heard something that should never have been uttered.

"I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!"

What happened next was a bit of a blur. Lily left quite upset. Seda would have gone after her but James had flipped Severus upside down again and was threatening to take off his pants

"JUST STOP IT YOU ARRAGONT TWAT!"

Seda had had enough of their stupid games. She whipped out her wand and pointed it directly into James's face.

"Aww, is the Glyfforin coming to the rescue of old Snivellus?"

"Shut up and put him down, Potter."

James released Severus, but the pointed his wand at Seda.

"Brave enough to take me on? Someone needs to be taught a lesson."

Seda was ready for him, except she made the grave mistake of glancing over to Sirius. In a flash she was hanging upside down. She screamed and flailed her arms about.

"REMS!"

James and Peter were laughing hysterically. Seda began to sob as she tried in vain to cover herself.

"SIRI PLEASE!" She almost choked on her words because of her sobbing. "SIRI HELP ME!"

"No one to save the savior, eh?" James danced around as he taunted her.

In between her tears, Seda was able to snatch a look around. Remus's eyes were glistening with tears behind his book. Sirius was just standing there with an impassive look on his face. From around a few trees came Severus, Regulus, and more of their gang.

"Put her down Potter!"

Regi and the rest all pointed their wands straight at him with looks that could kill a man.

James huffed, "I was getting bored anyway."

He set Seda down and marched off with his friends in tow. Only Remus looked back helplessly. Seda sat there and sobbed. Two arms were draped over her shoulders. One belonged to Regi and the other to Sev.

"You okay?"

"I'll b-b-be fine," she managed to say through her choked tears.

The group helped her to her feet and guided her back to the castle.

Later that night, Seda was curled up in the chair next to the fireplace. Tears etched a sparkling trail down her cheeks. Slowly two figures approached her.

"You all right Seds?"

"What do you think?" She snapped.

"Oy Seda, you don't have to be so mean to Moony. He's only being a good friend."

"Bullshit."

"What?" both asked.

"If you two were any kinds of friends I would not have been humiliated by your best friend, James."

Remus kneeled beside her chair. "I'm so sorry Seds. I should have..."

"Exactly, SHOULD have, but didn't." She turned her face away as fresh tears found their way out of her puffy eyes.

Sirius stayed in the shadows of the dying fire, not adding any other commentary. Remus placed his hand on Seda's arm, which she jerked away.

"Go away."

"But Seds..."

"Go. Away." Her voice held such force that Remus was taken back.

"Okay, Seds. I'll go." He promptly stood up to leave, but lingered long enough to place a peck on her moist cheek. This brought another set of tears down.

Sirius stood there with the same impassive look he had before. That is, until Remus left, then his eyes began to look moist. He bent down near her.

"Seda.."

"I said go away."

"I know. But you should realize from all our years together that I am extremely stubborn."

"You are far worse than Remus or even James are."

"Why?"

"Because of all those years we had that you speak of."

"Seda.."

"No. Your charms can only get you so far. And you yourself broke the spell that your charms held over me. I don't care about you. You are nothing but a big phony. You never cared about anyone but yourself. I wasted most of my school years hoping against all odds that you would even speak to me in public. Now I could care less. You are nothing to me. Now. Go. Away."

Sirius was stunned. But he slowly got to his feet and began to walk away. He paused at the base of the stairs and whispered low enough so she wouldn't hear, "You have always been everything to me. I was just afraid to show it."


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen: Following the Wrong Path**

It has almost been two years since the incident that completely separated Seda from Remus and Sirius. The only contact she really had with either of them was when she had confronted Sirius about the deadly prank he pulled on Severus that involved Remus's transformation. She had ended up placing a jinx on him that painted him a vibrant shade of lime green.

Remus had tried several times to reestablish a connection with her. She was always polite, but never overly friendly. Even Lily had begun to act a bit differently towards Seda. She wasn't mean or impassive. She just didn't hang out with Seda as much. This hurt a great deal to Seda. She had thought of Lily as one of her best friends. She spent most of her time with Regulus, Severus, and their friends, though she didn't think too highly of any of them and made a point to stay closer to Regi and Sev.

"Oy Seda! Hurry up!"

Regulus had dragged her along to one of his little friends meetings. The called themselves the Death Eaters or something of the like. She didn't care. She didn't like this lot. They talked too much of purifying Hogwarts and how much better they were compared to Mudbloods and Muggles. It sickened her. It felt like she was back in her father's or Mrs. Black's house.

"I said hurry up!"

"I'm coming. I'm coming." Seda wasn't too thrilled about this adventure, so she took her time.

_Regi said we were supposed to be meeting their leader or something. What was his name? Lord Moldy-something? Or something to that effect. Who is this wanker who calls himself a Lord? What in Merlin's beard is he the lord of? Lord of the Idiotic Pure-blood maniacs? Lord of the annoyingly stupid teens? Bloody Hell, I already don't like this guy._

The group was standing in a circle wearing black cloaks and masks.

_Oh great, we going to a Mask or something? Suddenly I feel like I have entered one of my parents many annoying parties. I expect we should be learning a ritual dance and chant next. Then maybe slaughtering a pig or something. Stupid tossers. They probably have no clue why we are all standing out here in the first place._

Out of the shadows came a waxy and oddly distorted looking man. The whites of his eyes had a permanently bloody look to them. Seda didn't want to look at him, but couldn't make herself stop. He had an air about him that made her want to vomit. His gaze settled on her and he smirked. She, then, felt a wave of pain that felt like someone was scratching through her brain. She visualized doors and started closing off her mind, pushing back the probing fingers. That was one lesson her father gave her that she had never forgotten.

The strange man's face contorted. He looked frustrated, yet interested. He eyed her a bit more. She gave him one of her impassive faces that she was slowly gaining fame for. Finally he moved on about the circle.

_What a bloody wanker! Trying to search through my mind. Bleh! I really hate people who think they are so much better than everyone else, thinking they can probe anyone's mind that they please. Regi sure has gotten in with a horrid lot. He promised loads of fun. Yeah protecting myself from Legilimency all night is going to be LOADS of fun. Bollocks!_

The meeting had already begun. They were talking about something that Seda had no interest in. She stared blankly at the different parchments that were placed on the ground. She committed them to memory just in case. Seda knew that if these guys were really up to no good that Dumbledore should be alerted immediately, and he would need all the information he could get.

_My photographic memory has finally come in handy for something other than school. Hooray! I feel so bloody excited._

At the end of the meeting, Seda could feel the probing fingers trying to creep back into her mind. She imagined a window closing on top of those fingers. The strange man's face showed only a microscopic hint of pain. Only Seda really saw it because she was looking for it. He maneuvered his face into what would have looked like a smile. It gave Seda that need to vomit again.

It was the Christmas holiday, and Seda was allowed to spend it at the Black house. Mrs. Black didn't like the fact that Seda was in Gryffindor, but since she spent her time with Regulus it didn't matter much. Mrs. Black even gave Seda Sirius's old room, since he had run away the year before. The room change would allow Seda to be on the same floor with Regulus, and thus encourage any romance that might occur between them. Seda loved Regi, but not in the way that his mum wanted.

Life was somewhat good again for Seda. Though she hated the group she was now associated with. She had determined that if things got any worse that she would go straight to Dumbledore with every bit of information she had. The strange man had begun to scare her with his glances at her. Every time he looked at her his hungry eyes held the look of a predator stalking his prey. At least her life wasn't getting any worse than it already was.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen: Kreacher's Tale**

But things did get much worse. The Dark Lord's plans expanded and began to rip holes in the wizarding world. In Seda's final year at Hogwarts she joined Dumbledore's group created to fight Voldemort, The Order of the Phoenix. But she had to do so secretly. Only Dumbledore knew she was on their side. She relayed all of the information she was privy to, and took back slightly false information on the Order's business.

Regulus had begun to doubt the Dark Lord. It started after Voldemort took Kreacher and used him to put some kind of locket in a basin of potion. Kreacher came back looking half dead. Poor Regi was distraught, and decided that he didn't want to be a part of that group anymore.

"I'm so sorry for dragging you into all this Seda."

"Regi, you don't have to apologize anymore. Just help me take care of poor Kreacher."

Kreacher had told Regulus and Seda all about what the Dark Lord had told him to do, and how he left him to be swallowed by the Inferi. Seda could hardly bear listening to the story.

"The little Mistress doesn't need to lower herself by caring for Kreacher."

"You deserve it Kreacher. You were very brave in taking those orders and returning to tell us."

Kreacher blushed a deep crimson. Regulus had been pacing the entire time since Kreacher had returned.

"Kreacher, I order you to stay hidden and not to leave the house."

"Yes young master."

The two teens left Kreacher to sleep. When they reached their rooms, Regulus beckoned Seda into his room.

"What are you thinking Regi?"

"I don't know, but I don't like it."

"What should we do?"

"I don't know."

"Okay. Well let's not make it too obvious that we know something is wrong. Okay Regi?"

"Right, right."

Regi was so distracted by his own thoughts that he was hardly paying her any mind. Seda left him in his room and went to her own. Pictures and other things that Sirius had put up still littered the walls. Smart Sirius had placed the Permanent Sticking charm on everything he put on the walls so his mother couldn't redecorate. Seda didn't mind though. She loved looking at all of the pictures. They reminded her of better times in her life.

A few days later Seda woke in the middle of the night with a chill. Something was wrong. She could feel it. She crept over to Regulus's door and gave a slight tap. When there came no answer, she opened the door. It took all her might not to scream. Regulus was gone.

Seda almost flew down the stairs to where Kreacher slept. He was gone as well. Something was truly wrong. Her heart banged against her chest. It sounded like a herd of centaurs were running around her ribcage. She ascended the stairs to her room, and proceeded to get dressed and ready. Then she descended the stairs back to Kreacher's tiny lair and waited.

Seda was suddenly woken by a frightened, sobbing Kreacher.

"Little Mistress...p-p-please... wakes..."

"What is it Kreacher?"

"It's M-m-master R-r-regulus, little Mistress."

"What Kreacher what?"

"H-h-he's gone."

"Tell me everything Kreacher. Now."

"Master R-r-regulus forbade me t-t-to tells..."

"Kreacher, did he order you not to tell me?"

"N-n-no little Mistress."

"Then tell me everything."

Kreacher sat on the floor and tried to calm himself enough to tell her everything.

"Wells, little Mistress, Master Regulus came to Kreacher in the night. He was strange, Kreacher could tell. He asked Kreacher to take him to the cave the Dark Lord had take Kreacher to. When Kreacher and the young Master reached the cave, Kreacher showed him the ways in, all the way across the lake to the basin."

Kreacher began to sob again. Seda urged him to continue.

"Master Regulus took from his pocket a locket like the one the Dark Lord had. He told Kreacher to take it and swap it for the one in the basin when it was empty."

Kreacher's voice became raspy. "He ordered Kreacher to-to-to leave w-w-without him. And he told Kreacher to go h-h-home and never to tell my M-m-mistress what he had done. He told Kreacher to destroy this l-l-locket."

Kreacher lifted a golden locket with an S inscribed on it.

"M-m-master Regulus drank all the p-p-potion and Kreacher swapped the lockets. And w-w-watched as young M-m-master Regulus w-was d-d-dragged b-b-beneath the w-w-water and..."

Seda couldn't hear the rest. Her sobs came in uncontrolled bursts.

"So he's..."

"Y-y-yes l-l-little M-m-mistress."

Seda closed her eyes. Her heart was about to burst with sadness.

_No._


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen: Seda VS Sirius (Round Two)**

_Regi is dead. This can't be happening. He was too young. Oh Regi, why did you leave me so alone? You can't be dead. You just can't be. Why did Sirius not save us like he promised all those years ago?_

Her head was swimming with questions and pleads. She had left the Black house right after Kreacher told her about Regulus's death. Tears still blurred her vision. She had just lost one of her closest friends, one of the only people who she still spoke to. She had wandered about for a bit. Then, she decided to go to Sirius's new house. He had bought it with money one of his uncle's had left him.

_He will pay for not saving him._

She approached the small, but impressive house. The windows were a glow, and it seemed that loads of people were inside chatting. None of that truly registered with Seda. All she could think about was getting to Sirius.

She knocked on the door and stood patiently with her wand behind her back. Sirius answered the door. He didn't look directly at her because he was saying something over his shoulder. As soon as he turned his head his eyes bugged out.

"Seda..."

He didn't get to finish his sentence because she had blasted him through about three walls. All commotion in the house stopped abruptly. Sirius staggered out of the rubble.

"YOU COULD HAVE SAVED HIM!"

Another spell was thrown in his direction. It slammed him against another wall.

"YOU COULD HAVE STOPPED WHAT WAS HAPPENING!"

He hit another wall. All of the other people in the house hadn't moved at all. Some still had their glasses raised to their lips.

"IT IS YOUR FAULT!"

Seda's anger fueled her spells with extra power. Sirius tried to speak, but each time he was slammed into another wall that didn't have a hole in it already.

No one could understand what was going on. No one understood Seda's pain and why she held such hatred for Sirius at that moment. Sirius was the one that was even more confused than everyone else. He hadn't really seen Seda in a long time and now she has shown up screaming about saving someone and blasting him through walls.

Finally he managed to speak, "Save who?"

"YOUR BROTHER!"

"What do..."

"HE'S DEAD! AND IT'S ALL YOU FAULT!"

Sirius was hit with more than just Seda's spell. His brother was dead?

Seda hit him with another spell that sent him flying into the woods behind his house. Her calm walk was the one thing that stopped everyone else from attacking her.

James turned to Lily and Remus, "Wasn't that the childhood friend of Sirius's brother, Regulus? What was her name? Seda?"

Remus turned pale. The three of them stared out of the hole in the wall that Sirius and Seda had gone through.

Seda slammed Sirius into another tree. By this time Sirius had taken out his own wand and was firing back, but not as effectively. She got close enough to wrap one hand around his throat and squeeze.

"Seda...what..."

She slapped him and sent him flying with another wave of her wand. Sirius stood up and hit her with a spell of his own, holding her fast to a tree trunk. She struggled a bit, but Sirius was on her in an instant.

"What is it that I could have done Seda? Hmm? What would you have had me do?"

Seda began to weep, "I d-d-don't know."

Her tears broke Sirius's heart. He knew what Regulus had dragged Seda into, and he knew that there was nothing, no matter how much he wanted to; he could have done to prevent his brother's death.

He released his spell on Seda, and she crumpled into him. The two sank to the ground. Sirius was cradling her in his arms. He gently wiped a tear from her cheek.

"Oh Siri.." She buried her face in the crook of his neck. Her fingers laced into his thick black hair.

"It'll be okay Se-Se." He lifted her face to his a placed a gentle kiss on her lips. The two leaned back into the soft ground.

Seda woke up with the sun lightly kissing her bare skin. She turned her head towards her breathing pillow. Sirius's bare chest was slowly rising and falling. She brushed a stray bit of hair out of his face. He twitched, but continued to sleep.

All of Seda's sorrow had slowly melted away last night. Regulus had given himself to save everyone. He knew some secret about the strange locket. It must have been important to stopping the Dark Lord, Seda knew. It pained her to lose Regi, but she knew it was at least for a good reason.

Sirius stirred, causing Seda to draw away from her thoughts. She leaned over a kissed his temple, then his cheekbone, then his lips. His eyes fluttered open.

" 'Morning sleepy head."

"Good morning, my girlie."

"Your girlie?"

"Yes," he said as he wrapped his arms around her, "You are my girl."

"And when did this happen?"

"Don't you know? You've always been my girl."

Seda blushed a deep crimson and looked deep into his gray eyes. She wanted life to stay just like this, but knew that it couldn't.

"You should be heading back. I bet they are worried."

"The Order can live without me for a few more hours."

Seda blanched, "Please don't tell me I attacked you with all of the Order of the Phoenix standing around your house."

He merely smiled at her.

"Oh great.."

"Hey don't worry. I'll explain.."

"How in Merlin's beard are you going to explain the fact that I tried to kill you, then we...we..."

"You're right. That's going to be difficult." Sirius chuckled at her.

"It's not funny. They probably think I killed you."

"True. True. But look at it this way, at least you'll get to see Remus and Lily again."

She stared at him. She did want to see them again, to stay with her Siri, but she knew her responsibility to Dumbledore.

"I can't."

"Why?" He sat up suddenly.

"I have to go back."

"No." He grabbed her by the arm. "You don't have to."

"They will come looking. I will put you all in more danger than you need to be."

"But Seda.."

She cut him off with a swift kiss. "Siri, it's just the way it has to be. I have a job to do."

He didn't protest or ask anything else as they got dressed and headed back. Seda stopped him before they got too close to his house. She squeezed his hand and he wrapped her into a hug, knowing it would a while before they would see each other again.

"I love you Siri."

"And I love you Seda."

They exchanged a kiss and Seda slowly released her grip on his hand. She began to walk away, then stopped and turned. She smiled at him and changed into her Animagus form. The white tiger bounded away. Sirius stared after her.

"So you're a white tiger? Interesting." He mumbled as he walked into his house.

The members of the Order had fixed most of the damage. When James and Lily spotted him, they ran and squeezed him into a hug.

"Are you okay? Are you hurt? What happened? Where were you?"

Many questions were flung Sirius's way. He didn't care. He spotted Remus who gave him a look that was filled with tears. Sirius kept walking and sat down in a chair, deep in thought.


End file.
